ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You say you're "an old soul".
You're 21. The only old thing about you is your phone's battery health.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You put "entrepreneur" in your bio. You've sold one pair of trainers on Vinted…
- Your company's core values are printed on the wall. So nobody has to have…
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- You call yourself "a bit of a foodie". You've ordered the same chicken 64…
- You've been "circling back" since March. At this point you're space debris.
- Every summit sends a very strong signal. The planet keeps not receiving it.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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