ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your 5am routine went viral.
You did it once, filmed it, and have slept until 11 every day since. The algorithm doesn't know. Your landlord does.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Don't settle. Your standards already have. They didn't tell you.
- Youth is wasted on the young. You wasted yours too. Old age is next,…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- You flipped a water bottle on Monday morning just to feel something. It landed.…
- You've "found your aesthetic". It's beige. It's always beige.
- You said you're "built different". You're built the same. Just assembled worse.
- You moneymaxxed so hard this month you earned $4.80 in cashback. It cost three…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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