ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The first email you open on Monday is a reply-all from Friday.
Forty replies. Four mention you. None kindly.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Be yourself. Everyone else is taken. They were picked first. You're what was left.
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
- Monday has its own support group. The group is everyone. The meetings are also…
- You flipped a water bottle on Monday morning just to feel something. It landed.…
- You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- Quality family time: everyone on a different screen in the same room, harvested by…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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