ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The bins are now fortnightly.
The council tax is still monthly.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone. Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do…
- Think outside the box. The box had the budget. You're out here with a…
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- Your inbox reached zero once. The server was down. You were briefly free and…
- You did the Mannequin Challenge again for old times' sake. The standing still was…
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- Your step counter used to set goals. Now it just sends "Hello?" like a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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