ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SATURDAY, 25 DECEMBER 1971
You said "that's so me" about a horoscope.
It also described 600 million other people and a goldfish.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The return to office is completely optional. So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet…
- You call your mum "for advice". You call her for the Netflix password.
- You went "no contact" with your ex. You still check their Spotify. They're listening…
- You "work best under pressure". You don't. You just only work under pressure.
- Good things come to those who wait. You waited so long they went to…
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- You have a "comfort show". You've watched it 11 times. You've seen your friends…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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