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ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED

DAILY DEMOTIVATION

A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.

ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION SATURDAY, 12 FEBRUARY 1972
You moneymaxxed so hard this month you earned $4.80 in cashback.
It cost three new cards and a Sunday. You get roughly 4,000 Sundays. That was one.

— Zack, unqualified

VERIFIED
UNHELPFUL

PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE

  1. Both sides declared victory. The only clear loser was your Tuesday evening.
  2. Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
  3. The return to office is completely optional. So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet…
  4. There's no I in team. There are two in "invoice still unpaid". And one…
  5. The update is 200GB. Your free afternoon was smaller.
  6. Hard work pays off eventually. It's paying off right now. Your boss just bought…
  7. You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.

THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR

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Newsletter / Issue No. 446

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