ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to something.
They haven't. They've committed to watching your stories within four seconds and replying to nothing.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Limited-time event. Will not return. Neither will your Saturday.
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- Your bio says "foodie, traveller, dreamer". You've been abroad once, and you still talk…
- Your partner says they'd be lost without you. They'd be lost for about eighteen…
- You're ageing like a fine wine. Expensive, slightly sour, best kept in the dark,…
- Micro-dating is a thirty-minute coffee to see if there's a spark. There wasn't. She…
- Life is short. A measurable chunk of it will be spent in the post…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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