ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 20 APRIL 1972
Your squad misses you, says the notification.
Your squad is four strangers and a retention dashboard.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- Loud budgeting is telling everyone you can't afford brunch. Quiet budgeting is going anyway,…
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
- The council listened to your feedback. Then it did the thing anyway, but with…
- "It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English. It will be only…
- Lessons will be learned. By whom, and when, will also be learned. Eventually. Possibly.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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