ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You have a "5-year plan".
It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're "taking a social media break". You announced it on social media. Twice. With…
- The light at the end of the tunnel is someone asking, "Can you see…
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- You're not broke. You're pre-rich. The "pre" is permanent.
- You can't take money with you when you go. Your direct debits, however, will…
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
- You have an eleven-step skincare routine. Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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