ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your financial advisor is a spreadsheet you opened once in January.
It's been screaming quietly ever since.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- Your Candy Crush streak is on day 212. The game hasn't been fun since…
- Money can't buy happiness. You'll never have enough to check.
- You've "romanticised your life". It's a candle, a croissant and a playlist called "main…
- You've rewritten that text nine times to sound like you didn't care. It's been…
- Listen to your body. It's asking for a biscuit and a lie-down. It's been…
- Your boss hasn't taken a sick day in ten years. He has, however, given…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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