ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Loud budgeting is telling everyone you can't afford brunch.
Quiet budgeting is going anyway, checking your balance in the car and moving retirement to 79.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The bins are now fortnightly. The council tax is still monthly.
- They say sweat is weakness leaving the body. Yours has decided to stay.
- You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment". It took you three days to…
- Everyone's bringing back the dog filter. Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look…
- You "grew out of" your old friends. They grew out of waiting for you…
- Till death do us part. Not a vow. A fixed-term contract with an unspecified…
- Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing. When you…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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