ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The house will be tidy again one day.
The day they move out. Tidy, silent, and you'll hate every inch of it.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your company will send flowers to your funeral. They'll be charged to your department's…
- Your 47 open tabs are an accurate map of your inner life. Someone will…
- Disrupt the industry. The industry will disrupt you back, then buy your logo for…
- Parenting is ten percent love and ninety percent asking where the other shoe is.…
- Being single means nobody steals your duvet. It also means the duvet is the…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- You went "no contact" with your ex. You still check their Spotify. They're listening…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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