ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 30 JANUARY 1975
You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment".
It took you three days to reply "thanks".
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- You "romanticise studying". You've filmed it, lit it and soundtracked it. You haven't studied.
- You film "Sunday reset" videos. By Tuesday your room has reset itself, to Saturday.
- The loot box has a 0.5% chance of something good. The studio has a…
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
- You have 47 tabs open. Three are jobs you'll never apply for, one's a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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