ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The battle pass costs £9.99 a season.
Your childhood cost nothing and had better rewards.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- Think outside the box. The box had the budget. You're out here with a…
- You're not a CEO. You're one person with a logo, a free email account…
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- You deleted the app "for good". That was 40 minutes ago. You've reinstalled it…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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