ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
MONDAY, 12 FEBRUARY 1979
You call your mum "for advice".
You call her for the Netflix password.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- The hardest part of working out is getting started. You've made sure it stays…
- Monday is a core collaboration day. As, it turns out, is every day ending…
- Listen to your body. It's asking for a biscuit and a lie-down. It's been…
- Someone laminated an "Acceptable Behaviour" poster for the office kitchen. It will still be…
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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