ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The spark never fades.
It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint funeral plan.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your company's core values are printed on the wall. So nobody has to have…
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
- "It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English. It will be only…
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- You reinstalled Pokémon Go to get your steps up. Eleven kilometres later you'd caught…
- "We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise. One of you will die…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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