ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SUNDAY, 11 APRIL 1982
The award show ran four hours.
The only winner was the advert break.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- "Let's take this offline" means "let's never speak of this again." That's also the…
- You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
- They're taking time away from social media. You know because they posted about it…
- Running clears your head. Mostly of the idea that you're a runner.
- You'll never get on the property ladder. The only plot you'll ever own is…
- Your step counter used to set goals. Now it just sends "Hello?" like a…
- You bought 41 games in the Steam sale. You will play two. The other…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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