ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
WEDNESDAY, 13 MARCH 1985
Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing.
When you leave, someone will fight over the plant.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
- You received 40 fundraising texts today. Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
- You've "romanticised your life". It's a candle, a croissant and a playlist called "main…
- Dating apps let you meet hundreds of people. All of them are "just seeing…
- You'll leave your children everything you have. It's mostly a bread maker and an…
- Till death do us part. Not a vow. A fixed-term contract with an unspecified…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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