ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 31 MAY 1985
Your soulmate is out there.
Currently leaving someone better on read.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Nobody notices when you do your job well. Everyone notices when you leave at…
- Every Monday you swear this week will be different. You've sworn it nine hundred…
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
- You said "that's so me" about a horoscope. It also described 600 million other…
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- Hard work pays off eventually. It's paying off right now. Your boss just bought…
- Your Candy Crush streak is on day 212. The game hasn't been fun since…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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