ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You received 40 fundraising texts today.
Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You "work best under pressure". You don't. You just only work under pressure.
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
- Treat yourself, they said. You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every…
- Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone. Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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