ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The light at the end of the tunnel is someone asking, "Can you see my screen?"
You can. You always will.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your step counter used to set goals. Now it just sends "Hello?" like a…
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
- He vanished for five months, then texted "haha so true" like he'd just popped…
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
- Mistakes were made. The Notes app has never once said by whom.
- Running clears your head. Mostly of the idea that you're a runner.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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