ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're ageing like a fine wine.
Expensive, slightly sour, best kept in the dark, away from people.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your 5am routine went viral. You did it once, filmed it, and have slept…
- Your Sunday-night plan for Monday was ambitious. Monday read it, laughed, and forwarded it…
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- Nobody has ever said "thank goodness it's Monday". Except a manager, and he meant…
- Wealth is built slowly. Debt is built quickly. And it's hereditary.
- Good things come to those who wait. You waited so long they went to…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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