ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're ageing like a fine wine.
Expensive, slightly sour, best kept in the dark, away from people.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Monday is a perfectly normal day. You've got about two thousand more of them.…
- Compound interest is the eighth wonder of the world. Your overdraft found it first.…
- Nobody notices when you do your job well. Everyone notices when you leave at…
- You have a "5-year plan". It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
- The council listened to your feedback. Then it did the thing anyway, but with…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- “Too close to call” means nobody knows. It is said by people paid a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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