ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Someone laminated an "Acceptable Behaviour" poster for the office kitchen.
It will still be on that wall long after your name is off the door.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. You took it…
- Your step counter used to set goals. Now it just sends "Hello?" like a…
- Everyone's bringing back the dog filter. Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look…
- Find your purpose. It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key…
- Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone. Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do…
- You "can't do mornings". You also can't do afternoons, evenings or emails.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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