ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Treat yourself, they said.
You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every one.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You've rewritten that text nine times to sound like you didn't care. It's been…
- You said "that's so me" about a horoscope. It also described 600 million other…
- You said "this is my year". You've said it since 2019. The years have…
- You swore you'd never sound like your parents. You just said "because I said…
- Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress". It said the…
- The light at the end of the tunnel is someone asking, "Can you see…
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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