ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SUNDAY, 6 NOVEMBER 1994
No pain, no gain.
You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your file.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You left them on read "to be mysterious". They didn't notice. They were also…
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
- Early access means you paid to watch someone not finish something. You do that…
- You've "been meaning to" for three years. The thing you meant to do has…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- Your startup is a chatbot that tells customers they're right. Investors loved it. The…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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