ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're "so random".
You've told the same "so random" story at every party since 2022.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
- It's not a career ladder. It's a hamster wheel. The hamster has a LinkedIn…
- Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing. When you…
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
- No pain, no gain. You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your…
- You left them on read "to be mysterious". They didn't notice. They were also…
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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