ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Find your purpose.
It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key to a flat you'll never live in again.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Not all who wander are lost. You are. The map gave up.
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
- Some days you're the pigeon. Most days you're the statue, and nobody remembers who…
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- You swore you'd never sound like your parents. You just said "because I said…
- They say sweat is weakness leaving the body. Yours has decided to stay.
- "It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English. It will be only…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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