ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
"We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise.
One of you will die first. It'll still be pending.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
- You bought 41 games in the Steam sale. You will play two. The other…
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
- Find your purpose. It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key…
- Your boss hasn't taken a sick day in ten years. He has, however, given…
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- You said "my For You page knows me so well". It knows you're awake…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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