ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Parenthood is a long journey
from "mama" to "can you send money" to them choosing your care home.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your out-of-office reply is the most confident thing you wrote all year. Nobody noticed…
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- You "romanticise studying". You've filmed it, lit it and soundtracked it. You haven't studied.
- Nobody has ever said "thank goodness it's Monday". Except a manager, and he meant…
- Your Candy Crush streak is on day 212. The game hasn't been fun since…
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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