ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
MONDAY, 19 APRIL 2004
You said "my For You page knows me so well".
It knows you're awake and lonely at 2 a.m. That's not a gift. That's data.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- Kids grow up so fast. Except between 5pm and bedtime, when time stops and…
- Your job title will outlive you. It's already been posted on LinkedIn, with a…
- You have 47 tabs open. Three are jobs you'll never apply for, one's a…
- You have a "5-year plan". It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
- You're "so random". You've told the same "so random" story at every party since…
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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