ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought.
It renews automatically. So does the guilt.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Some people run marathons. You run late, and you still come last.
- Inside every older person is a younger person. The younger person is furious about…
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- Your thirties are your twenties with consequences. The hangover lasts until Wednesday and reports…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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