ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Hard work pays off eventually.
It's paying off right now. Your boss just bought a boat.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- Some people run marathons. You run late, and you still come last.
- Inside every older person is a younger person. The younger person is furious about…
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- Your thirties are your twenties with consequences. The hangover lasts until Wednesday and reports…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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