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ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED

DAILY DEMOTIVATION

A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.

ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION SUNDAY, 27 MARCH 2005
Money can't buy happiness.
You'll never have enough to check.

— Zack, unqualified

VERIFIED
UNHELPFUL

PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE

  1. Fortnite was free to play. It was not free to stop.
  2. You have an eleven-step skincare routine. Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is…
  3. Find your purpose. It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key…
  4. Strangers online have voted you "not wrong". The same strangers once voted to give…
  5. You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
  6. Your savings account isn't empty. It's a memorial.
  7. You call your mum "for advice". You call her for the Netflix password.

THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR

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Newsletter / Issue No. 445

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