ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You swore you'd never sound like your parents.
You just said "because I said so" in your dad's exact voice. He lives in you now.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
- You bought 41 games in the Steam sale. You will play two. The other…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- They're taking time away from social media. You know because they posted about it…
- Your 47 open tabs are an accurate map of your inner life. Someone will…
- "Per my last email" is the closest you'll ever get to a duel. You'll…
- Your thirties are your twenties with consequences. The hangover lasts until Wednesday and reports…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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