ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The customer is always right.
The customer is also on hold, forever, which is exactly how the company likes it.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Loud budgeting is telling everyone you can't afford brunch. Quiet budgeting is going anyway,…
- Your company's core values are printed on the wall. So nobody has to have…
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- You film "Sunday reset" videos. By Tuesday your room has reset itself, to Saturday.
- The best time to start saving was twenty years ago. The second-best time was…
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
- Doom spending is buying a heated eye mask because the news was bad. The…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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