ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your step counter used to set goals.
Now it just sends "Hello?" like a relative checking you're still alive.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Step outside your comfort zone. It's raining out there, everything costs more, and nobody…
- Think outside the box. The box had the budget. You're out here with a…
- Your company's core values are printed on the wall. So nobody has to have…
- You "romanticise studying". You've filmed it, lit it and soundtracked it. You haven't studied.
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- You've rewritten that text nine times to sound like you didn't care. It's been…
- Someone laminated an "Acceptable Behaviour" poster for the office kitchen. It will still be…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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