ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before you'd finished typing.
The children have requested a second opinion. They'll be getting it in 2041, at their own expense.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You have an eleven-step skincare routine. Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is…
- Monday is a core collaboration day. As, it turns out, is every day ending…
- They're taking time away from social media. You know because they posted about it…
- Youth is wasted on the young. You wasted yours too. Old age is next,…
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- Some days you're the pigeon. Most days you're the statue, and nobody remembers who…
- Loud budgeting is telling everyone you can't afford brunch. Quiet budgeting is going anyway,…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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