ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your 5am routine went viral.
You did it once, filmed it, and have slept until 11 every day since. The algorithm doesn't know. Your landlord does.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The house will be tidy again one day. The day they move out. Tidy,…
- You "don't believe in labels". You believe in being kept as an option.
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- You have an eleven-step skincare routine. Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is…
- Quality family time: everyone on a different screen in the same room, harvested by…
- Hard work pays off eventually. It's paying off right now. Your boss just bought…
- You say "it's not that deep" a lot. Your Notes app has 300 entries…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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