ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your boss hasn't taken a sick day in ten years.
He has, however, given out about forty.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- No pain, no gain. You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your…
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- Your chatbot calls every one of your ideas "a really insightful question". Zack has…
- You say "it's not that deep" a lot. Your Notes app has 300 entries…
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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