ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You put "open to work" on LinkedIn.
Six recruiters viewed your profile. Five were bots. The sixth was your ex, checking you're doing worse.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said you're "so busy" this week. Your screen time says eleven hours a…
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- Somebody, somewhere, is checking their phone hoping it's you. It's a debt collector.
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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