ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your out-of-office reply is the most confident thing you wrote all year.
Nobody noticed you were gone.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The in-office lunch is optional. The man with the clipboard and no sandwich is…
- The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. You took it…
- You don't have a spending problem. You have an income problem, and it's terminal.
- Somebody, somewhere, is checking their phone hoping it's you. It's a debt collector.
- Monday has its own support group. The group is everyone. The meetings are also…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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