ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your call is important to us.
Not important enough to answer, but important.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Kids grow up so fast. Except between 5pm and bedtime, when time stops and…
- You asked the internet whether you were the bad guy. The internet read the…
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- They say sweat is weakness leaving the body. Yours has decided to stay.
- True love is choosing the same person every day. They're choosing, daily, whether to…
- You've "found your aesthetic". It's beige. It's always beige.
- You've rewritten that text nine times to sound like you didn't care. It's been…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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