ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The return to office is completely optional.
So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet there you are, ranked 41st. They're "reviewing" 41st.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your company will send flowers to your funeral. They'll be charged to your department's…
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- Not all who wander are lost. You are. The map gave up.
- Your Sunday-night plan for Monday was ambitious. Monday read it, laughed, and forwarded it…
- Clear-coding means stating your intentions up front. Hers was "I have a hard stop…
- You moneymaxxed so hard this month you earned $4.80 in cashback. It cost three…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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