ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Beach body ready?
The beach has been ready for four billion years. It isn't waiting for you.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The weekend is two days long. Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're…
- Monday motivation is a myth. Like the Loch Ness Monster, a clean office microwave,…
- You've "been meaning to" for three years. The thing you meant to do has…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- Your financial advisor is a spreadsheet you opened once in January. It's been screaming…
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
- Your chatbot calls every one of your ideas "a really insightful question". Zack has…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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