ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
No pain, no gain.
You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your file.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Kids grow up so fast. Except between 5pm and bedtime, when time stops and…
- Everything happens for a reason. The reason is you. It's always been you.
- You've got a side hustle, a passion project and a podcast. Combined monthly income:…
- You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before…
- Nobody has ever said "thank goodness it's Monday". Except a manager, and he meant…
- “Too close to call” means nobody knows. It is said by people paid a…
- Be your own boss. Your new boss naps at 2pm, can't pay you, and…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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