ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Every parent has a favourite child.
It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Hard work pays off eventually. It's paying off right now. Your boss just bought…
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- You say "it's not that deep" a lot. Your Notes app has 300 entries…
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
- Your friends' group chat went quiet. It didn't. They made a new one. Same…
- Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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