ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
A good night out now means home by ten.
Nobody had to come and get you. Nobody offered.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're ageing like a fine wine. Expensive, slightly sour, best kept in the dark,…
- Inside every older person is a younger person. The younger person is furious about…
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- Parenthood is a long journey from "mama" to "can you send money" to them…
- The weekend is two days long. Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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