ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SATURDAY, 13 JANUARY 2024
Parenting is ten percent love
and ninety percent asking where the other shoe is. Then they leave and take both.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Every subscription you forgot about still thinks of you monthly. That's more than your…
- You swore you'd never sound like your parents. You just said "because I said…
- Somebody, somewhere, is checking their phone hoping it's you. It's a debt collector.
- You bought 41 games in the Steam sale. You will play two. The other…
- "Per my last email" is the closest you'll ever get to a duel. You'll…
- Treat yourself, they said. You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every…
- Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone. Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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