ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Loud budgeting is telling everyone you can't afford brunch.
Quiet budgeting is going anyway, checking your balance in the car and moving retirement to 79.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
- Your 47 open tabs are an accurate map of your inner life. Someone will…
- You're "taking a social media break". You announced it on social media. Twice. With…
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- You have a "comfort show". You've watched it 11 times. You've seen your friends…
- The return to office is completely optional. So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 444
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